Peenie Wallie: January 2005 Archives

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January 30, 2005

Daughters

Here's a slideshow of some stills of Jennifer and her play mates. The audio track is "Daughters" by John Mayer. The slideshow is a 7 Meg self-playing executable produced using Imagematics StillMotion PE. Click on the photo above to download the slideshow. If you have an Apple, an iMac, or some other type of computer with training wheels, click here to download the Macromedia Flash version.Click here if you need help.

Posted by Peenie Wallie on January 30, 2005 at 11:10 AM : Comments (0) | Permalink

January 28, 2005

The Lost Coast

Here's a slideshow of some stills I shot recently. These images were all taken in January of 2005. Most of them were shot last weekend on my excursion to California's "Lost Coast". The first frames are of the sunrise in Denver, and some shots from the plane. The rest were shot north of San Francisco, in the counties of Marin, Sonoma, Napa, Mendocino, and Humboldt.

Unfortunately, my spankin' new Canon EOS 20D died after two brief months. I took picture number IMG_0001 with it on November 20th and picture number IMG_5642 on January 20th. So, it lasted exactly two months. I shipped it out today to have it repaired under warranty. They say they can turn it around in two weeks, so I've got my fingers crossed.

The slideshow is an 18 Meg self-playing executable produced using Imagematics StillMotion PE. Click on the photo above to download the slideshow. If you have an Apple, an iMac, or some other type of computer with training wheels, click here to download the Macromedia Flash version.Click here if you need help.

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Because the 20D was broken, I shot this trip with a Dimage Z1 camera.
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I'm not certain, but I think that this was my first trip up to the Lost Coast. This was a 2 day trip from SF to Eureka and back. I think that I sort of dreamed this little road trip up while I was working in SF for Genentech and then, when I rolled off the project, I took this little trip.

I tried to map out my route from my photos. It looks like my route was something like this:

http://www.peeniewallie.com/documents/lost_coast.xls

Posted by Peenie Wallie on January 28, 2005 at 11:20 AM : Comments (0) | Permalink

January 17, 2005

Configuring Perl to run under XP and IIS

"Jump Start" Perl under XP and IIS

'Adding a Simple Quote Generator To Your Web Page' or 'How To Configure Windows XP Pro Service Pack 2, IIS 5.1, and Dreamweaver MX to use Perl Scripts at 4:37 a.m.'

I'm running Windows XP Pro (Service Pack 2) with IIS 5.1 using DreamWeaver to host my own website locally. I wanted to add a "simple" random quote generator to my web page. However, this is a little be more complicated than anything I've tried to set up using Dreamweaver to date. Up to this point, I've been basically serving up bland HTML web pages to the servile masses, but I figured nothing ventured nothing gained and I was off to the races.

To read the remainder of the technical walkthrough, click here for a detailed explanation of how to jump start Perl under XP and IIS.

Posted by Peenie Wallie on January 17, 2005 at 10:19 PM : Comments (0) | Permalink

January 15, 2005

Bud and Alice's Party

The slideshow above has some shots taken from Bud & Alice's party tonight. Also, some stock I shot in the Rocky Mountains last summer, because I didn't get enough decent images of the party. I love my Canon EOS 20D, but the flash leaves much to be desired. If I had any cash, I'd get an externally mounted flash. The slideshow is a 6 Meg self-playing executable produced using Imagematics StillMotion PE. Click on the photo above to download the slideshow. If you have an Apple, an iMac, or some other type of computer with training wheels, click here to download the Macromedia Flash version.Click here if you need help.

Posted by Peenie Wallie on January 15, 2005 at 11:46 AM : Comments (0) | Permalink

Bud and Alice's Silver Anniversary

Bud and Alice were married on January 7th, 1980. Tonight, they stumbled into a Suprise Party for their Silver Anniversary at Bob and Vaunne's. Lynn dressed up like Father Guido Sarducci and hosted a moch wedding. Ray played the 12 string and sang. These are the kind of neighbors that you dream about having. Congratulations, Bud & Alice. Here's to another 25 years in Peaceful Hills!

This slideshow above was put together from a collection of old family photos surreptiously smuggled out of the house by Kate. I think the best picture in the lot may be the one of Kate sitting in the field ambushing doves with a 20 gauge. The slideshow is a 24 Meg self-playing executable produced using Imagematics StillMotion PE. Click on the photo above to download the slideshow. If you have an Apple, an iMac, or some other type of computer with training wheels, click here to download the Macromedia Flash version.Click here if you need help.

Posted by Peenie Wallie on January 15, 2005 at 11:29 AM : Comments (0) | Permalink

January 1, 2005

If Microsoft Made Cars

1. Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you'd have to buy a new car.

2. Occasionally your car would just die on the motorway for no reason, and you'd have to restart it. For some strange reason, you'd just accept this, restart and drive on.

3. Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre would cause your car to stop and fail to restart and you'd have to re-install the engine. For some strange reason, you'd just accept this too.

4. You could only have one person in the car at a time, unless you bought a "Car 95" or a "Car NT". But then you'd have to buy more seats.

5. Amiga would make a car that was powered by the sun, was twice as reliable, five times as fast, twice as easy to drive - but it would only run on five percent of the roads.

6. Macintosh car owners would get expensive Microsoft upgrades to their cars which would make their cars go much slower.

7. The oil, engine, gas and alternator warning lights would be replaced with a single "General Car Fault" warning light.

8. People would get excited about the "new" features in Microsoft cars, forgetting completely that they had been available in other cars for many years.

9. We'd all have to switch to Microsoft gas and all auto fluids but the packaging would be superb.

10. New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.

11. The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.

12. If you were involved in a crash, you would have no idea what happened.

13. They wouldn't build their own engines, but form a cartel with their engine suppliers. The latest engine would have 16 cylinders, multi-point fuel injection and 4 turbos, but it would be a side-valve design so you could use Model-T Ford parts on it.

14. There would be an "Engium Pro" with bigger turbos, but it would be slower on most existing roads.

15. Microsoft cars would have a special radio/cassette player which would only be able to listen to Microsoft FM, and play Microsoft Cassettes. Unless of course, you buy the upgrade to use existing stuff.

16. Microsoft would do so well, because even though they don't own any roads, all of the road manufacturers would give away Microsoft cars free, including IBM!

17. If you still ran old versions of car (ie. CarDOS 6.22/CarWIN 3.11), then you would be called old fashioned, but you would be able to drive much faster, and on more roads!

18. If you couldn't afford to buy a new car, then you could just borrow your friends, and then copy it.

19. Whenever you bought a car, you would have to reorganise the ignition for a few days before it worked.

20. You would need to buy an upgrade to run cars on a motorway next to each other.

Posted by Peenie Wallie on January 1, 2005 at 1:48 PM : Comments (0) | Permalink

Microsoft Announces Ads for 'Blue Screen of Death'

Redmond, WA - In an effort to boost sagging revenue growth, Microsoft today announced it will begin selling advertising space on the company's world famous Blue Screen of Death (BSOD)©. The screen, displayed whenever Windows cannot recover from an error in the operating system's core, until now has historically served as a display of unintelligible diagnostic data that has not made any sense to anyone, ever, according to a survey conducted by the Gartner Group. In addition, the BSOD has scared most users because it was composed mainly of hexadecimal digits that, which in extreme cases, can lead to hallucinations, epileptic seizures and homosexuality in primates and rats.
The Bud Screen of Death

"Past efforts to make the blue screen more helpful by adding animated characters and changing the hue to a more user-friendly beige or aqua have failed," said head of BSOD Development Kate Verban. "When we failed to make the BSOD user-friendly, we decided that at least it could generate revenue. Displayed more than a billion times a day globally, the blue screen has a captive audience, with over 90 percent of the computer desktops in the world. This makes it an excellent platform for advertisers, comparable only to the Super Bowl and makes watching the blue screen just about as exciting."

Tom Gordon, Director of Marketing for Anheuser-Busch, confirmed today that the beverage giant will be among the first advertisers, "We think it's a tremendous opportunity," said Gordon. "Picture this, you're working late at night on a crucial project. Your computer crashes. You've lost all your important work. It's definitely time for a beer, and we'll be there to remind you that the beer should be a beechwood-aged Budweiser."

For earlier versions of Windows, the BSOD ads will be installed using the Windows Update feature. However, Windows XP systems connected to the Internet will automatically install the new software in the middle of the night when no one is looking.

Posted by Peenie Wallie on January 1, 2005 at 1:46 PM : Comments (0) | Permalink

NTSB Pleas Fall on Deaf Ears at the FAA and Department of Homeland Insecurity

The NTSB is responsible for, among other things, making air travel safer in the U.S. They have a list of issues that they feel should be corrected in commercial aircraft, based on previous aviation mortality. However, the FAA, which is responsible for telling the regulating the commerical airlines, has a slightly different charter. Their goal is to keep the planes flying. So, they basically look at the NTSB recommendations, say they'll cost too much to implement, and keep the birds in the air. It's a classic example of "agency capture", whereby a government bureaucracy becomes a puppet of the industry it's charged with regulating. The FAA is deep in the pockets of the commercial airlines, and they basically ignore what the NTSB recommends.

NTSB Most Wanted Transportation Safety Improvements

Somehow, the Fear Mongers at the Department of Homeland Insecurity have decided we need to install missile defense systems on all 6,800 commercial airlines in the U.S., at a projected cost of around $10 billion. This would be a collosal waste of money and cost untold number of lives. It is not unreasonable to assume that there is a limit to amount of money to spend to save lives in the United States. Even if we run massive deficits and tax people up to 100% of their income, there is some theoretical ceiling to the funds that can be collected and spent. Therefore, it makes sense to spend those dollars wisely, so that the greatest number of lives can be saved.

The number of people in the United States is roughly 290 million people. Heart disease kills 700,00 people a year. Flu and Pneumonia kill 60,000 a year. Alzheimer's Disease kills 50,000 a year.

In 2001, when more people died in aircraft related accidents in the United States than ever before in the history of aviation, 918 people died in plane crashes. More people choked to death (3,021) and more people drowned (3,281) than died in plane crashes. Nor is this likely to change. It isn't like gangs of muslims will suddenly begin assembling outside the airports with shoulder fired missiles, shooting down a third of the commercial fleet.

Heart disease and Alzheimer's related deaths rarely make headlines, unless they affect someone very well-know, like Ronald Reagan. Although these deaths aren't as fascinaing or as titilating as plane crashes, the people are just as dead, and every dollar that is spent on James Bond missile defense systems of commercial airliners, in direct opposition to the government agency charged with making travel safer, means less money spent on curing the known scourge that afflicts our population, and countless premature deaths.

It's my understanding that one of the findings of the Nuremberg Trials that an organ of the state didn't have to directly cause deaths to be guiltly. If they could reasonably expect that their actions would result in the deaths of innocent people, then they were guilty as well.

Posted by Peenie Wallie on January 1, 2005 at 1:22 PM : Comments (0) | Permalink

Defense Department Plans Camp 6: Franz Kafka Surrenders

In the classic Kafka book 'The Trial', a man is charged with a crime, but the crime is so secret, that it cannot be revealed to him. So the man must attempt to present a defense, although he is never sure of what crime he has been charged. Even in his most compelling, paranoid, macabre novel, Kafka fell short of envisioning the machinery of Guantanamo Bay.

The Pentagon and the CIA have asked the White House to prepare prisons for lifetime imprisonment of people that have never been charged with any crimes. The Defense Department plans to build 'Camp 6' with your tax dollars to house hundreds of people in perpetuity, that will never have a trial, never speak to an attorney, and never be charged with a crime.

'That's OK.' You figure. 'They're terrorists, and I'm not a terrorist, so it doesn't affect me.' and you go back to your reality TV show while eating Doritos on the couch.

Who says you're not a terrorist? What's a terrorist? What about Eco-Terrorists? Do you own guns? Do you question the government? Do you drive an SUV? Remember, once you get tossed into these modern-day Con Son Island Tiger cages down in the Black Hole of Guantanamo Bay, you have no means to communicate with the outside world. There's no way to prove you're not a terrorist, once you're swallowed by Gitmo.

And just in case you need a little geography lesson, Guantanamo Bay is in Cuba, an island nation that your government won't even allow you to visit.

So you may want to hit pause on the Tivo and ask yourself - are you more afraid of a couple of muslims, or a government that's just been handed a license to erase people from the face of the earth?

Airplanes, Lasers, and Terrorists....Oh My!

I’m not convinced that potential terrorists are painting planes with lasers, primarily, because I don’t see any particular value in doing so. If a “terrorist�? wanted to “terrorize�?, planes seem somewhat passé. Historically, terrorists have shown a propensity to diversify in their objectives and attack softer targets.

Because people are not searched when they board trains, buses, subways, and elevators, these other targets are much softer. In the Middle East, terrorists routinely detonate bombs on buses, in malls, or in outdoor cafes. In Russia, they recently successfully detonated a bomb at the screening point outside a rock concert. So, all of these, in theory, would work to achieve the terrorists goals, if their goals are to “terrorize�? and gain recognition for a particular cause.

If, on the other hand, they really feel compelled to bring down an airplane, in no way, would that goal involve lasers. It’s not like there are shoulder fired missiles and rocket propelled grenades available for sale in the United States. That’s not reality based thinking. If someone offers to sell you a shoulder fired weapon, I can guarantee you that it is a federal agent running a reverse sting.

Besides, the height and speed of the jets during approach and takeoff is well documented, and readily apparent. So, for the terrorists to go around all over the country, pointing laser lights at planes, to calibrate their speed or altitude would not make logical sense. Plus, it would obviously serve to compromise their plan.

Finally, keep in mind that every Muslim in the country has been interviewed, interrogated, exported, or deemed an “illegal combatant�? and incarcerated deep in the bowels of Camp X-Ray down at Gitmo. I know because I have Muslim friends. They’re all too scared to answer the phone when it rings. So, to believe that there’s suddenly this broad conspiracy all over the country where terrorists are acting in a coordinated manner and shooting laser beams at planes that somehow the CIA, FBI, TSA, State, County, and City authorities all are blissfully unaware of, seems very remote indeed.

My theory is that it is either:

(a) reflected sunlight (remember, the sun is blinding if you look directly at it, or if it is deflected into your eyes), coupled with mass hysteria or
(b) possibly a government ruse along the lines of Operation Northwoods or MK Ultra or other government projects attacking U.S. citizens.

Nothing else makes any sense. Unfortunately, we’ve allowed the TSA to operate behind a wall of secrecy, so, in all likelihood, we’ll never know the true cause of these “incidents�?. Certainly, the investigation(s) into this phenomenon by the alphabet soup agencies (FAA, NTSB, TSA) will not be open to public scrutiny.

Update: FBI admits lasers not related to terrorism.

Posted by Peenie Wallie on January 1, 2005 at 10:36 AM : Comments (0) | Permalink

Peenie Wallie

A confused jumble of paranoid ramblings, politically incorrect diatribes, worthless photographs, amateur slideshows, and disturbing videos. Guaranteed to offend the narrow minded and amuse the rest.