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July 10, 2011
Hummingbird Dogfights
Jen and Allie come back from shopping loaded down with crap. Just junk they bought shopping at the mall. Stuff they don't need, of course, but things that satiate them temporarily, keeping boredom at bay through the long days of summer.
I'm sure I'm a bad parent. I'm sure that I shouldn't allow these little spurious transgressions. But what else is there in life but to spoil your kids.
I think that the people that are the most down on this are people who are just stoic and taciturn by nature. They enjoy telling others what to do, even when it involves something as private as how we raise our own children. Brilliant that others would tell us how to go about these endeavors. Fascinating that people without children think they can offer advice to those that do.
The more I watch kids grow up, the more resilient I think they are. I think that kids will survive into adulthood regardless of whether they're over-indulged as children.
I suspect there's hope for these two.
Yesterday, bored of watching the girls play "Go Fish" and "James Bond", two card games requiring precious little skill, I taught them to play Spades.
They both picked it up very quickly, and readily agreed it was far superior to the games they had been playing. And we sat there for some time, playing Spades.
Next door, I taught the neighbors to play and we sipped tequila until it was quite dark out.
And on the way home, I wondered that I'd never taught Jennifer to play the game before. Why did I wait until now? What else have I failed to show her as a parent? I'm afraid my shortcomings are too numerous to list.
Posted by Rob Kiser on July 10, 2011 at 5:39 PM
Comments
50+ years ago in a Duke Marriage and Family course, they taught that studies showed that "children reared in disciplined environs and children reared in permissive ones grew up to be equally well-adjusted adults." In my observations, this has held true.
Posted by: sl on July 11, 2011 at 8:59 AM